MAR 16, 2021 by RAFAEL ALEMÁN
No one is truly prepared for death. Even if death represents relief to someone who is suffering from an illness, the thought and feeling of emptiness that comes with the reality of not having the presence of that person around anymore, isn’t near close to imaginable.
Grief is presented to us as an emotion, triggered by the loss of something or someone dear to us. Grieving is not necessarily linked to the loss of a human being; it may be related to the loss of a job, a pet, or a material asset. One thing is certain: the feeling of grief becomes much more palpable when the loss of a loved one, family member, or friend occurs, especially if their death takes place in violent and unexpected circumstances, such as suicides or accidents.
In these cases, dealing with grief is much more difficult because we refuse to accept that someone loses their life like this. We enter a stage of denial, which could make it unbearable not to have that dear person among us. These events are traumatic, and it’s recommended that mourners receive special attention from specialists.
Take as much time as you need to process what has happened.
There is no “right” way of grieving the sudden loss of someone you love. The reality is that you will face a rollercoaster of emotions: there will be good days and very bad days. Just the thought of living without that special person is hard enough.
Now, it’s important to allow yourself to feel these emotions: do whatever you need to do to express and vent your feelings. Specialists found that sometimes, talking about the events that happened helps, at least “accepting” the reality, even though you might never understand why it happened. Some things are just beyond our understanding. Don’t feel bad for turning to a friend or family for comforting, it’s in difficult times when you truly see who is close to you and, that’s what family and friends are for.
In addition to the specialized care that mourners must receive after an event as traumatic as suicide or crime of any kind, it is also important to count on compassionate people, professionals who support you and help you makes this tragedy just a little more bearable. For us at Bio-One of Oceanside, your health and well-being are our priority. Our team is discrete and compassionate, especially in challenging scenarios.
It’s OK to feel frightened by the future.
After a traumatic experience, it’s completely normal to feel scared and uncertain about the future and, when you lose someone with whom you shared projects and aspirations, it can be difficult to accept the reality of their absence and move on without them.
All of the sudden, your world, the one you used to feel safest at, is an uncertain place to even think about being part of. Know this: the feeling of fear is normal after a traumatic experience. It’s important to identify the most common symptoms that are related to the fear of the future: headaches, back pain, feelings of panic, and anxiety.
You can’t expect to go back to the world where you used to feel secure. For all you know, that’s the place where disaster and tragedy struck. That said, you can feel confident about one thing: the world was the same as it is now, you just didn’t know it yet. Now, you are more mature, and you understand that even though times can be extremely difficult, you are capable of living in it, relying on the people who love and care for you.
If you ever feel overwhelmed, exhausted, and just can’t bear to be in this new reality that life has put you through, don’t feel ashamed to turn to a mental health professional. Humans are full of complex emotions and sometimes, you just have to turn to someone who helps us understand everything a little better.
If you are a religious person, hold as tight as you can to your beliefs, talk to your pastor or priest… talk to anyone who can provide you with comforting words of wisdom. As we mentioned before, some things are just beyond our understanding but, it’s always important to know that we can find peace in our faith, regardless of our religion. It’s what ultimately will provide us with the strength to carry on, to be… somewhat prepared, for the unexpected.
Helpful tips from Trauma Intervention Programs, Inc. (TIP) on Coping after a Traumatic Event
Facing life after experiencing a traumatic event is not easy. The truth is, you have to learn how to live in spite of the absence of your loved one and it’s an every-day process. Trauma Intervention Programs, Inc., a non-profit organization founded in 1985. TIP of San Diego shared a Resource Guide on Helping Citizens in Crisis.
You can access and download TIP of San Diego - Resource Guide here.
Bio-One is here for you.
Our Team at Bio-One of Oceanside understands the challenges that come with facing a traumatic experience. Our main goal is to be a genuine support for you and your loved ones during these difficult times. In the events of coping with the death of a family member due to a traumatic experience, our team is specialized in leaving the place where violent events occurred, free of all evidence of a struggle and disturbance.
Our Team at Bio-One of Oceanside is prepared to face these situations and show solidarity with you. We understand your painful situation, and we are willing to collaborate to make the process of traumatic events a little more bearable.
If you find yourself facing a difficult situation, trust us, let us help you. Bio-One specializes in all types of cleaning: traumatic death, homicide, suicide, and more.
Give us a call at 760-429-0729. We are available 24/7, 365 days a year.
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